Depressing

jon laa wrote on March 29th, 2009, 1:16 am

I was mocking at carrie for her liking towards good books, which tend to slant towards depressing themes revolving about love.

Enjoyed twilight a lot, as a read. Just googled and saw the movie poster, the actors chosen were all not according to what I have in mind. Perhaps it was that bad a movie. Getting back to the book, I thought it was a chic lit, or some teenage fiction with lots of love and lots of happy moments. Love at first sight, self-denying love to be exact, but upon further exploitation, it is actually rather depressing.

Luke went for night run with me last night, we got lost amidst the housing estate. Quite hilarious. And he just told me he caught the running bug.

Edward actually took a century, or perhaps a few centuries, before he found somebody who entices him. Putting it in context, I don’t have a tenth of a century to spare. I will like to marry early, so I say.

The relationship between bella and edward is actually pretty ironic when compared against the relationship between renee and charlie. If bella and edward were to live the happily-ever-after conclusion, the stark contrast is pretty much a mockery. Dark humour perhaps. If they were to not live happily-ever-after, the entire relationship will be much of a joke and probably signifies a vicious cycle of sorts.

My friend who read the other three books that follows very kindly informed me that she did become a vampire eventually and they lived happily ever after. Uh, with a kid, no less.

And charlie seems to be stuck in this solitary misery, and seems to be reduced to fishing and doing noble work to find some sort of content and satisfaction in his life. There is this bit of loneliness that revolves around him, from his lifestyle. Upsetting as well.

Fleming, on the other hand, found new love and seems to be waiting to repeat the vicious cycle again.

The purpose of charlie and fleming in the story isn’t entirely that clear. But either way, they aren’t exactly happy people to have around. Fleming displayed signs of compulsive disorder (through her emails) when bella first left her to joined charlie, and it kinda signifies some sort of insecurity. I would think.

Fine. I am thinking too much and probably getting too emotional.

But I took literature!

And the emotional part was probably the reason why I dropped out entirely. And I don’t think I am going to read again. I will stick to movies.

Loves.

Better write it down and get it off my head, instead of pushing it to a later day.

I am starting to grow weary of certain people, and I always weary of that certain type of people. Those who never seem to tell the truth, those who are indecisive. It brings out the nag in me, because somewhat there is no confirmation, no certainty, no assurance that they know what they are doing and they will be doing as they have said. Being colleagues, they are horrifying and condemned. Being friends, they are exhausting and repulsive.

It doesn’t help, honestly, when they readily lie for no apparent reason. And brings about confusion, for no apparent reason as well. Leave the wrong ideas in other people’s minds and never seem to get down to correcting them, at the same time pretending to be all affected.

Give me a break, fuck off.

Of course there are those who are quite close, like never remembering details and always remembering the wrong one. And coming back to me for confirmation when I am not even involved. And also being totally forgetful, like never remembering details. It has been very tiring and I only you realise, but you don’t. And sometimes I wonder why I have so little trust, because there hasn’t been enough certainty from you - I realised. I will like to move on with life without you, but you have been pleasant and a great companion. But you know what? I realise you aren’t whom I can deal with at this point in time. And I wish you would eventually go, and I hope you do.

Probably going on a hiatus in a while. It feels much better to not have to deal with others’ irresponsibilities.