Leaving the closet

by jon laa on December 5th, 2009

This is a horrendous week though nothing far from manageable.

The usual asshole is being annoying - nothing short of normal. Been interacting more with him and it’s getting on my nerves. Been walking off and away. Been exposed to his baseless and unjustified opinions.

Gross.

I don’t think I mentioned one of the selfish dude said to me, “you’re selfish but I am more selfish than you.” It puts me off that I am suppose to embrace people who are consciously selfish. And I am quite sick of providing more than necessary in my graciousness.

Most of the people there replies text messages real slow and they are not that opinionated. There are some who lives in their own world - I cannot decide if this is considered being opinionated - without being able to look into others; they’re subconsciously living in their own world. I consciously live in mine, I believe so.

Been significantly more open, liberal without going to the extend of revealing who I am. More open, liberal like making controversial statements, letting more of my artificial self be noticed. Less hiding. But it kinda got people to look and observe, which I don’t like, and it’s making me go into my tortoise shell again. I think I am testing waters. I’m trying to look at how people respond to what I show to decide how much of myself should or show.

Pfft, talk about being complicated.